If Only I Could Have the Universe: Chapter 2

I wasn't planning on writing any more of the story, but I couldn't resist. It's too amusing not to write. Anyways, there really isn't any good way around the aliens/sci-fi bit, but I figure that this is a comedy, and nothing is too ridiculous for a comedy. Not that I have anything wrong with aliens. They are just slightly annoying. But anyway, that comes later. For now, enjoy. I will have another post up soon.

...

Ella Mackenzie was very set in her ways. For one thing, she hated being late. She was never late. It was her mother who was late, her idiot, lazy, good-for-nothing mother. No. She was not going to think about her mother today. If she did, she might have to hurt something, and she was not about to damage her beautiful new car. Besides, Ella thought, clenching the steering wheel, she was late enough already.

Then again, maybe she could just run right over whoever was stupid enough to crash their car on the road she took to work. Except she couldn’t do that, because the road was closed, which was why she was late.

I hope you burn up in your stupid car. No, I hope you survive with some really nice burns. Look at me! Look at me! I’m the idiot who crashed my car during rush hour! Mother was an idiot too. Oh wonderful.

Ella stopped at a red light, pondering why a few of them couldn’t be green today. Oh right, because she should be at work by now. Another car rolled up, heavy metal blasting through open windows. There was a moment of bliss as she imagined casually throwing over an explosive and wiping their obnoxious bobbing heads off the planet. Oh yeah, that would make some noise. Then again, that would really screw up her car. So instead she slid Bach: The Complete Bradenburg Concertos into her CD player and turned the volume up to full blast.

Bingo. Green light. She waved goodbye to the third, fourth, and fifth idiots of the day.

And managed to make it all the way to work without going too far over the speed limit. Ella smiled as she tossed her keys to the valet. Late or not, this was exactly where she belonged. She stepped into a perfect elevator, all glass and mirrors and tile, and shot straight up to the twentieth floor. The top floor.

The doors opened with a ping and a flustered secretary leapt up to greet Ella. “You’re here! Oh good. Great! Let me just get Mr. Sefton.” The words tumbled out, and her fingers were already energetically punching at the buttons on the phone.

Blake Sefton wasn’t far behind. He never was. Blake was the kind of person who was in control, and he always knew what was going on.

Ella pushed her hair behind one ear, apologizing for her tardiness. “I’m sorry that I’m late. Some idiot drove their car into a pole and they didn’t have the good sense to explode somewhere else.”

“Yes,” Blake said coolly. “That is exactly what I need to talk to you about.”

“You want to talk to me about being late?”

“No. I would rather talk to you about the fact that one of my employees is now sitting at the side of a godforsaken road, roasting in his own car.” He managed to say this in a completely conversational tone, Ella thought. She had to give him credit for that.

“That’s not possible.”

“Humor me Ella. Why is it not possible?” They were walking briskly down a hallway with so much technology that Ella nearly fainted.

“Mr. Sefton, I’m fairly certain that you do not hire idiots, although it is a comfort to know that the person who blocked my road is now a pile of ashes and is not, in fact, adding his DNA to the gene pool.”

“He had a daughter actually.”

“I wouldn’t like to meet her.”

Blake raised one eyebrow. She really admired people with that ability. “I believe you already have.”

“Well,” she sighed, “then that explains something of the stupidity of the human race.”

“She was your sister, Miss Mackenzie.”

Ella stopped for a moment, her head tilted to the side. “If you’re trying to scare me, then you’re not doing a very good job of it. I already know that my siblings aren’t ever going to develop intelligence. So far today, the biggest shock is learning that you hired a man without the good sense to drive himself to work...”

“Well I suppose we cannot all be as efficient as you.”

“…Actually, it’s sort of a relief to finally know what is wrong with Katie…”

“And for the record, I do not hire idiots, nor do I happen to know somebody named Katie.”

“…Minda then. Although I wouldn’t mind knowing where you get your information. My mother doesn’t even know who fathered her children.”

“Ella!” Blake Sefton stopped and gave her a long look that screamed shut up. “Trent Rivers was a brilliant man whose contributions to the organization will be greatly missed. We have solid information that his death was the result of an attack. Now. You were hired for a reason, and yesterday, you were promoted for no other reason than that you are also a brilliant member of our community. Unless your plan is to jeopardize your career on the first day, then here,” he said, thrusting a file into her hands, “take this. Come back here when you are done. We have more to talk about.”

Ella grabbed the file, neatly turned on the heel of her shoe, and then realized that Mr. Sefton had led her into an office.

“And Ella,” he said, halfway out the doorway already, “I thought that this might interest you.”

Ella looked around as Blake Sefton walked back into the hallway with his business suit and black business hair. After a long while standing dumbfounded, she decided that she had overestimated her mom.

Trent Rivers was an absolute creep. He was seriously mental. Scattered all over his desk, there were little candid shots of her mother and siblings. There was an especially large number of Madison. Her little Maddy, the only cute one in her family. She whispered a little prayer for her sister, and then a prayer for people everywhere that Madison did not grow up into a Trent Jr. She then promptly fled the room.

Back in the lab, Ella finally opened the file.

Adam Smith, it read. Alien conspirator and murderer of a number of people including Trent Rivers.

“Don’t worry,” she muttered. “I’ll whip up some nice food poisoning for you Mr. Smith. You have done a great thing for humans everywhere today. The least I can do is make sure your death is quick and relatively painless.” She threw the file onto a counter, dropped her jacket and purse on top of it, then stopped to reconsider. “No no, that’s all wrong. Because of you, I was never able to run Trent over myself, or possibly cause him permanent damage and maim him for life. So. Make that quick and relatively painful.”

Ella got to work, her hands were fast in practiced movements and her feet never faltered in five-inch heels on a smoothly polished floor.

It took her less than half an hour to throw something together, slip off the lab coat, and gently place the flask into her purse. She put her designer brand coat back on her shoulders and took the elevator back to her car.

“Hello Davies,” she greeted the valet with a smile.

When he returned with her car, Davies took care to hold the door open for her. “You’re full of smiles today. Heard you’ve moved up. I like the new car, by the way. Very smooth.” Ella simply smiled again and drove away. She had business to attend to.

After all, she was hired because not only was she an amazing scientist, she was a pretty incredible assassin too. And she was smart and she was beautiful.

She was going to have the universe, whether Aaron believed her or not. Definitely.

...

It is sort of a work in progress right now, but that's just the way it is I guess. You can't expect everything to be perfect before you're even done writing the story.